Saturday, May 15, 2010

grow up, mister

When I was 15, I was witness to a high school violence where the parents had brought others and ‘kidnapped’ a friend of mine in to a car RIGHT IN FRONT OF ALL THE STUDENTS AND PARENTS at the bus stop (it was just after school) and a little way from the bus stop, he managed to push himself out from the car, where they started beating him and even with one of those giant metal car locks.

Right in front of everyone, so many people and cars passing by.

But of course nobody dared do anything. Cars passing by honked at them, and students all gathered from afar to gape and keep wishing for someone to stop them. Prefects ran to get teachers. I wonder if anyone called 999.

The victim was a member of a ‘gang’ who all ran to help him, and after awhile, the perpetrators left when they were either sure of making their point, or to run before the cops arrive.

Rumour had it that the victim’s ‘gang’ and the other person (I’ll label him the ‘culprit’ in this case) had a little misunderstanding, which resulted in the latter bringing his parents (and gang) to beat up my friend and to teach them a lesson. Obviously ‘the culprit’ did not return to school, most probably he and his family had already decided after that show of violence, to stop him schooling and work in their family business (of beating people up) or something.

I went home utterly traumatized, crying with anger and mixed feelings. Once I had calmed down though (it took me an entire day) the first thing that came into my mind was, how could the parents have taken part in this?

Isn’t it the parents responsibility to talk sense into their ‘wronged’ child, when he complains to them about what had happened in school? To tell their children that sometimes you just have to let things be, and not to make such a big useless fuss of every small issue that comes their way?

Instead, they chose to indulge their child in ‘seeking revenge’. How mature.

It’s as if they want their child to learn from their doings and think, my parents say it’s okay to seek revenge and beat people up whenever they don’t please me.

Common sense would tell the average person that violence is never a good thing. But judging from the crime rates since the world started up until today, maybe I should know better than to trust that everyone has compassion, empathy, sympathy, or even the slightest of tenderness in them.

Some people (even though I might not have met them in person) might just have completely ZERO mercy in them. Even though the best of me still hopes that the most violent serial killer in the world, whoever he may be (no, it cannot be a woman, I’m still not ready for such a revelation!) may still render a little love for his pet pug whom he feeds sparsely and keeps in his smelly rented one-bedroom apartment littered with old pizza boxes, torn pornographic magazines and unwashed singlets. (Yes, media stereotyping at its best here.)

Going back to the issue, it is to my utter disappointment that I have observed many adults not acting their age. By that I mean doing things that they should know is wrong, and yet do not take the effort to apologize for leading a bad example. Maybe they think that it is embarrassing and that only ‘young people’ need to apologize to make up for something wrong they did, but then since they had already like what they did in the first place, wouldn’t it already automatically put them on the ‘young and immature’ seat, only that this time it’s the ‘physically mature but not attitude-wise’.

Once you’ve reached a certain age I expect you to stop doing things like bitching, making stupid decisions on purpose etc because it’s your responsibility to act and justify your age. For younger people always have eyes on you and your reaction to whatever happens, as a means to learn how to react themselves when something similar happens.

Therefore when I read through The Star papers today, the one article which really caught my eye and got me thinking was the one about a 16-year-old student who was forced into a car, brought somewhere and then beaten up, slapped and physically hurt with a pair of scissors. The cause was allegedly a misunderstanding between her and a schoolmate which led to the latter’s mother (a Wanita MIC chief, no less) who led this attack on the girl.

I really don’t know what to say about this (actually I do – and I will). The full story may yet to be uncovered but the gist of the story is enough to give me chills. An excerpt:

“I only slapped her because I was angered that she had been spreading rumours about my daughter,” she said, admitting that she had driven the car ferrying the girls but denied using the scissors.

The issue is not whether you used the scissors or not, but even if it’s true that all you did was drive the car and slapped the girl, it is just plain wrong. VERY very wrong. How can one, an adult with more responsibilities than the average adult, trusted to protect the citizens, do such a thing? And even to a 16-year-old girl? Isn’t it your responsibility as a mother, human being, Wanita MIC chief to lead a good example?

I wonder if her daughter will grow up losing respect for a mother like this. I only hope that she would not grow up to be like her.

And they wonder why kids these days are so wild.

2 things to say:

Johnson Chai said...

nice end of your post. :)

Samantha Chow said...

thank you for agreeing with me! :)