Wednesday, November 24, 2010

a different kind of life

Funny how some things like fluff on your newly washed clothes come into you life uninvited and disrupting a peaceful life where things like fluff on newly washed clothes should be made illegal got me thinking too. Having watched loads of really good movies these few days, which includes The Butterfly Effect (and it was so damn good – mostly I mean the storyline). It made me think of the decisions you make in life. Surely we all have some things we would like to change, some past choices we would not have chosen had we the opportunity once more. I for one do not have many things that I would like to change, but those that I want to would perhaps have changed my life so much that perhaps I wouldn’t be where I am now, sitting here typing these random musings of where I could have been. Or perhaps had I made those different decisions, I would have also ended up here on this chair, wondering where would I be had I made a different decision (than the different decisions I’m speaking about). It all goes in a circle you see? I believe that sooner or later you still end up where fate wants you to be, regardless.

For example, I would perhaps change the decision I made to stop hanging out with with you once I discovered that a close friend of mine had a crush on you. It was a heroic attempt to choose ‘friend over boy’ and I still wonder until this day whether we would have been something else had I just gone on with the flow. And whether me and my friend would have stopped being friends, instead of the good friends we are now. Of course she doesn’t know what happened, and some things aren’t meant to be told. It’s a whole chapter in my life which I am not eager to experiment, as I am happy with the way things are now and there’s no point stirring water under the bridge.

Another would be whether I would change the decision I took in not helping out a friend the other day. The issue wasn’t whether to help her out, more of me taking the effort to be able to help her out (it’s not a one day thing) and the decision I made was that I couldn’t and wouldn’t have the time to. It would have been different had I chosen to, that’s all I can say. But if you were to bring me back to the past and asked me to choose again…I can’t say that I would change my decision.

Like I said, I don’t regret most of my decisions. However I still sometimes wonder what would it be, had I taken a different road that day, had I decided to say yes instead. I believe that decisions, once made cannot be altered, and that the smallest of them form a path into what will you become in the future. Therefore it is not a surprise that most of us wonder a second chance would mean. A different kind of life. A different kind of hope.


Life’s fleeting glances gives most of us not a second to rethink

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Ouch now I remember why I wanted to stay off the computer. My wrist hurts bad!

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